Connected

For someone who can often openly describe himself as happily anti-social, it makes for the perfect foil when I find myself the loudest in the room, or leading a training session, or even craving social interaction.

At the same time, I tire of social settings as quickly as I adjust to them, when I thrust myself (or am thrust) into them.

For a long time, I felt bad wanting to be the first to leave, or wanting to leave “just when the parties getting started”, or wanting to eat my lunch alone, in a solitary crevice of the office. But it’s a recent area of change for me, the comfort in doing me. The comfort in knowing myself better than I ever have, and the strength to do what makes me happy and comfortable. Not in any sort of selfish way, by all means, if the occasion calls for it, I’ll suck it up, throw myself back into the midst of it all, and do what’s best in the situation.

So I guess the point of this musing is small and simple, and that is that it’s okay to not be what everybody wants you to be all of the time, but there is definitely value in allowing yourself to be in unfamiliar, uncomfortable, or just irregular situations. Sometimes it’s where we have the most fun. But we can do it with balance, knowing our limits, and being flexible.

Guise.

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Socially Expectable 

People piss us off, weird us out, make us see similarities to ourselves and make us question why they could possibly be the way they are. 

The problem is, though, that we overgratify the value of our own opinion from others. By using terms like “socially acceptable” we express a self indulgent connotation that it is okay for someone else to dress that way, or behave in that manner. In reality though, whether we accept or reject someone’s sense of acceptable dress means shit. We are not a qualifier in their. Whether we should be a qualifier though, is a question of morals And cultural norms, one that I’m not currently prepared to approach. 

And so it is a matter of our social expectations which we are truly capable of passing commentary on. We expect to see people dress either how we dress, how celebrities and other public figures dress, or how the greater populace dress. Perhaps that is the most disappointing part of this thought. 

We have teenagers wearing shorts that are shorter than short, yet this now appears to be the cultural norm. So when we see someone dishevelled, in a comical outfit, looking like they have just emerged from a three months hibernation in front of a computer screen on a diet of domino’s and Fanta, we are confronted with something that is different, something that we did not expect to see. But how different we would feel of that was the norm, if that was how the majority of the population groomed themselves. 

With that, I leave you with this week’s thought. Don’t let our expectations guide our connections, don’t let acceptance be self-inflated, and most importantly, don’t let me tell you what to do. 

Guise.